Counselor's Corner: Whatever You Focus on Most Will Grow

I came to the realization this morning that over the last several months, I have been focused way too much on all the things wrong in my life. After a series of disappointments, let downs, and frustrating circumstances I began to see life through a “distorted filter.” My focus became on what was wrong in my life, and I had difficulty seeing the good from the most difficult of my circumstances.

I have always tried to see the good or positive in situations, but when I allowed myself to focus primarily on the negative, my entire outlook on life changed. Life became difficult and discouraging, which eventually lead to feeling hopeless that things would get better.

►Ways you can change your focus to the good, the lovely and what is praiseworthy (Philippians 4:8):

1.     Forgive yourself. If you have struggled with focusing on the wrong things, forgive yourself and change your perspective.

2.     Forgive others. Yes, people may have hurt you, used you, and rejected you but forgive, release and bless them.

3.     Take responsibility for how you feel. You are in control of your life. People and circumstances can affect you but ultimately you can exert self-control over allowing them to spiral into a negative focus. You cannot control people or circumstances, but you can choose how you will respond.

4.     Take every thought captive into the obedience of Jesus Christ. Become aware of your thoughts, and choose to replace the negative thoughts with truth.

5.     Retrain your thoughts to intentionally see the positives in yourself and in others. If you are constantly picking out the negative qualities in yourself and in others you will see yourself and others the way the enemy wants you to.

6.     Wherever you focus your attention and energy will become your reality. How do you want to shape your reality? The enemy will certainly help you to magnify the negatives in life.

While God guards our hearts (Philippians 4:7), we are also commanded to focus our lives on things that please God (Philippians 4:8). Focusing on the positive in any situation can increase your faith. This is not to say to ignore reality, but to truly believe that God does work out all things for good who love Him and are called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28). When we focus on the negative it weakens our faith and increases stress, anxiety and fear in our lives.