Counselor's Corner: Dealing with Stress in a Healthy Way

Between 75-90% of all doctor’s visits are related to stress. Your body will let you know if you are experiencing stress, there will be physical symptoms. Not all people deal with stress the same way. Our bodies are designed to handle stress in small doses, but we are not equipped to handle long-term, chronic stress.

Stress can affect people physically, mentally/emotionally and spiritually. Stress is the body’s reaction to harmful situations-whether real or perceived. When you feel threatened in any way, a chemical reaction occurs in your body that allows you to act in a way to prevent injury. This reaction is known as “flight or fight,” or the stress response.

Signs and symptoms that you may be experiencing stress:

1.      Restless sleep or insomnia.

2.      Fatigue or tiredness.

3.      Headaches.

4.      Back pain, upper and lower back pain.

5.      Neck pain.

6.      Dizziness.

7.      Upset stomach, nausea and/or stomach pains.

8.      Labored breathing, heart rate and blood pressure increase.

9.      Chest pain and/or feeling tightness in chest.

10.  Hormonal imbalance, skipped monthly cycle and/or increase in PMS symptoms.

11.  Feel agitated, irritable, frustrated and/or angry.

12.  General malaise or just don’t feel well.

13.  Difficulty concentrating.

14.  Decrease in arousal, desire and intimacy.

15.  Feel overwhelmed.

16.  May cry more easily or not at all.

17.  Difficulty enjoying life.

18.  Feel anxious, tense, nervous or on edge.

19.  Difficulty getting a handle on your emotions.

20.  Decreased energy.

21.  Appetite changes, and/or weight gain or loss. Increase in abdominal fat.

22.  Feel bad about yourself, worthless and/or depressed.

23.  Cold or sweaty hands and feet.

24.  Clenched jaw and grinding your teeth.

25.  Dry mouth and difficulty swallowing.

26.  Constant worrying, can’t turn your mind off.

27.  Forgetfulness and disorganized.

28.  Feel pessimistic and can only see the negative side.

29.  Increase use of alcohol and/or drugs.

30.  Skin and hair problems like acne or hair loss.

The first step in controlling stress is to know the symptoms of stress.

Practical steps to deal with stress in a healthy way:

1.      Start exercising, walking, running or whatever gets you going.

2.      Do something that you enjoy every day or at least weekly.

3.      Take warm baths with Epson salts to relax tense muscles.

4.      Drink green tea, Chamomile tea or kava kava tea to relax your mind.

5.      Slow down and breath, do what you can do but don’t give out what you don’t have.

6.      Write and/or talk about what has got you feeling stressed.

7.      Don’t overcommit yourself especially when you feel physically/mentally worn-out. Learn to say, “No.”

8.      Try deep breathing to relax. Slowly take a deep breath in and exhale slowly, repeat 3x.

9.      Eat a healthy, well-balanced diet and avoid sugar, high amounts of caffeine, fatty/fried foods, carbs and processed foods.

10.  Connect with those who don’t make you feel stressed, get a healthy support system.

11.  Be gentle and go easy on yourself. Experiencing stressful and especially chronically stressful situations can be most challenging. Don’t beat yourself up if you need extra rest, or down time.

12.  Eliminate your triggers as much as possible. Figure out what is the biggest cause of your stress and see if you can eliminate or reduce them.

13.  Use aromatherapy to relieve tension and provide stress relief such as lavender, chamomile, and frankincense.

14.  Try natural herbs such as kava kava, lemon balm, chamomile, ashwagandha or lavender to reduce stress and anxiety. (Please talk to a health care provider before using any herbs or supplements).

15.  Listen to soothing music such as classical, or nature sounds.

16.  Spend time with your pet. Having a pet may help relieve stress by giving you purpose and keeping you active.

17.  Set limits and cut back on what is not essential.

18.  Keep your challenges in perspective. Difficulties have a way of working themselves out. Focus on the opportunities and eliminate negative thoughts.

19.  Take a day off or a half a day and relax.

20.  Pray, give thanks, and meditate on God’s Word.

Everyone deals with stress and if you are a Christian you are not immune to stress. How you deal with stress depends in large on who you are. For some, emotional stress causes physical illness and some shut down mentally and emotionally. Know what is in your control to change and what is not in your control to change, and then surrender what you cannot change to God.

Let’s Discuss:

What will you begin to use to help reduce stress in a healthy way?

Counselor's Corner: Most of What We Worry About Never Happens

I read somewhere years ago that 85% of what we worry about never happens! And 15% of what does happen you will be able to handle better than expected.

When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened. Winston Churchill

Worry is feeling uneasy or being overly concerned about a situation.

Excessive worry puts your mind in overdrive and you constantly focus on what may happen. Excessive worriers react intensely to stressful triggers, and even thinking about the situation can lead to great anxiety. When we are worrying, we are in the midst of repetitive thinking that is non-productive. People who are analytical tend to worry more because they are trying to figure out a solution to their problem.

Everyone has normal stress and demands, but when worries and anxieties become chronic; the stress response can be triggered. The stress response is known as “flight or fight,” and causes the body’s sympathetic nervous system to release stress hormones such as adrenaline and cortisol. These stress hormones can trigger health problems such as dizziness, fatigue, dry mouth, irritability, headaches, shortness of breath, and muscle tension. The outpouring of stress hormones can lead to a suppressed immune system, short-term memory loss, and heart attack. When we worry our bodies respond the same way it would react to physical danger. Your body will tense up as you prepare for danger and this can turn into aches and pains such as headaches and back pain.

Worry is a waste of time, and it drains us of energy. Why do we worry then? We believe that all our worrying will help somehow. We believe that if we worry enough we might prevent bad things from happening.

Worry leads to anxiety and anxiety leads to fear. Worry can also make you more prone to depression. Worry disturbs your peace and it becomes more difficult to concentrate when worried.

You can rewire your brain to stop worrying by focusing on the following:

1.      When a worrisome thought enters your mind, immediately take that thought captive to Christ. Ask God to help you to stop repeatedly thinking about the problem and ask for His wisdom. Trust God and take your concerns to Him instead of worrying. It is okay to have concerns about things, but take them to God instead of mulling over them in your mind.

Be anxious for nothing; but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be known to God, and the peace of God, which passes all understanding, shall guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

2.      Become thankful. Be thankful for the things that you do have, and do not dwell on circumstances out of your control. Think on the good things in your life.

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and anything praiseworthy, meditate on these things. Philippians 4:8

3.      Focus on one day at a time. Stop projecting what may happen tomorrow. God’s grace is sufficient for the day, He does not give us grace for days and weeks ahead. Remember most of what we worry about never happens.

Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious or itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble. Matthew 6:34

4.      Trust God with your life and with your loved ones, even when you do not understand all what has taken place in your life.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight before you. Proverbs 3:5-6

Worry in not productive and it can trigger many health ailments, including depression. There is always something to worry about, but worry does not change anything for the good. The energy that is expended on worrying could be used for more productive things. It is okay to be concerned over things in our lives, but when we begin to obsessively think about the issues; we are worrying-talk to God instead about your concerns and leave the worries with the One who can do something about them.

For an additional resource on how to discipline your mind to overcome worry, depression and anxiousness check out my latest book, “Disciplining Your Mind, 30 Days to a New You.”