Thursday, March 16, 2017

Counselor’s Corner: Have You Forgiven Yourself


You have asked God to forgive you and you have asked others to forgive you, but have you forgiven yourself? Others do not need to remind you of your past mistakes and failures because you do a good job reminding yourself of them. You are your worst own critic.


If you are hard on yourself and you do not allow yourself the room to make mistakes and learn from them, you will not enjoy your life very much. The hardest person to forgive is yourself.

Reflect and ponder: Why do you believe you have a difficult time forgiving yourself? Do you believe that punishing yourself by withholding forgiveness somehow will pay for your mistakes?

Counselor’s Corner:

Why it is hard to forgive yourself:

1.      A lack of unconditional love for self. You have learned to love yourself conditionally when you do this or that, but not at all times.
2.      A root of perfectionism. A false belief that you must do all things perfectly or else you are a disappointment and a failure.
3.      You are overly critical and place yourself under a microscope examining each and everything that you have done or have ever done, while you allow others to be examined through a much larger lense.
4.      Self-condemnation. You beat yourself up with your words and come into agreement with what the enemy says at you. One of the enemy’s favorite tactics is bringing up past sin and mistakes.
5.      Others have not shown you true forgiveness, so you don’t feel worthy of forgiving yourself. Significant people in your life have made you feel unworthy of forgiveness.
6.      You magnify your failures and do not allow yourself any allowances for weaknesses.
7.      Anger at yourself for allowing something to happen over and over again.
8.      A lack of understanding God’s grace and how He forgives. God’s grace is not like man’s grace. God’s grace is not based on merit or the ability to earn it. God’s grace is getting what you don’t deserve.

Not forgiving yourself will cause you to see things through the eyes of guilt, shame, and condemnation. Not forgiving yourself can destroy your faith. Become easy on yourself, and when you do made a mistake or fail ask God to forgive you and believe that He does! Stop rehearsing the negative tapes in your mind about your past sins and failures. Learn from your mistakes, and realize that you did the best that you could at that time.


MEDITATE ON THESE SCRIPTURES:

In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace.
Ephesians 1:7

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
1 John 1:9




Wednesday, March 15, 2017

Counselor’s Corner: Walk By Faith Not By What You See


If you determine the outcome of a situation based upon what you see in the physical, you can lose heart quickly and grow weary. The enemy wants you to focus on what you see, not on God’s promises. When you have been praying about a situation for a long time and what you see is what appears to be the exact opposite of your prayers, your faith will be challenged. It is easy to have great faith when your prayers are being answered, but when your prayers seem to go unheard, there will be a test in your faith.

God gives promises and certain scriptures to believe for in your difficult and challenging situations. When those situations increase in difficulty and you have believed for years for change and nothing appears to be happening, you must develop your Christian maturity. Christian maturity is believing God’s Word and His faithfulness when everything around you says the opposite.

Reflect and ponder: Are you walking in faith or have you stared too long at your situations and believed what you see instead of what God has promised?

Counselor’s Corner: When the storms of life hit, they can seem stronger than God’s Word. If you walk by what you see, you will rely upon fleshly instincts and temporal pleasures to make decisions. Walking by faith in contrast is being absolutely convinced and assured of what you hoped for and believe according to the promises of God in the Scriptures is going to come to pass. Hebrews 11:6 says, “Without faith it is impossible to please Him.”

Faith = trusting God completely. When you trust God in all things, a deep and abiding peace can cover you. Trust can be defined as the belief that someone or something is reliable, good, honest or effective. Do you trust God with all your uncertainties in life? Unlike men, God never lies and never fails to fulfill His promises.

Your faith is most tested when what you have been praying for looks hopeless and lifeless. Faith can be defined as an unquestioning belief in God, and complete trust and reliance upon God’s promises. Your faith is likened to a muscle, the more you use your faith muscle, the more it will be strengthened-No exercise of faith=a weak faith. When your faith can be tested over and over again, your faith muscles will become strong. You will never know if your faith is genuinely real until it has been tested and tried. It is easier to believe God and His Word when all is going good, but when it seems you have been living a life of losses like Job; your faith will either be made strong or your faith will be weakened in those times. Doubting God’s promises or His goodness can cause anxiety, worry, fear, and discouragement. Stand on God’s Word by believing He will fulfill His promises to you, even if it looks the opposite of what you are believing for or you have been travailing over the same promises. What has God promised you about your children, your health, your finances, your marriage? Set you mind to believe God by faith about what He has promised you through His Word.

MEDIATE ON THESE SCRIPTURES:

For we walk by faith, not by sight.
2 Corinthians 5:7

Faith is the substance of things hoped for, and the evidence of things not yet seen.

Hebrews 11:1

Tuesday, March 14, 2017

Counselor’s Corner:How to Arise and Fight like a Warrior


Are you a warrior? A warrior is a person engaged or experienced in warfare, or a person who shows great vigor, courage or aggressiveness. As Christians we all are in an unseen war, and some Christians live defeated while others live like warriors.


Have you noticed that the enemy does not just sit back and easily let you move forward, make progress, or slay your “giants?” You must learn to become a fierce warrior to win the battle that is being waged against you in the unseen realm. You have to push through the advancements the enemy targets you with. You may not know that there is a war taking place, but anytime you feel discouraged, defeated, oppressed, depressed, or “battle fatigued,” you best believe there is an invisible war happening to cause you to give up. Everyone has felt like giving up at some point in their lives, but when you experience this spirit of defeat and oppression on a regular basis that says to you, “just give up, it’s too hard, or you’ll never get better,” it’s time to arise warrior and take your position!

If God has given you promises that you are to move into your Promised Land, yet time and time again the “giants” in the land appear larger than they are, and you cower back in defeat-you will stay in the wilderness defeated.

Reflect and ponder: Are you brave and courageous like a warrior or have you put your “weapons” down and surrendered to the “giants?” Do you know what your “giants” are? Are you ready to “slay your giants?”

Counselor’s corner:

How to become a warrior for the Kingdom of God:

1.      You must be disciplined, internally and externally. This means you are disciplined in your thought life as well as taking care of your temple (your body). You must be in top shape in all areas of your life.
2.      You must develop a singular mental focus on Jesus, His Word and His promises and not become focused on circumstances that you have no control over. If your circumstances begin to take over and you sense defeat, remember that you are a warrior and cannot get entangled in affairs that would seek to destroy you-move on and move on quickly!
3.      You must develop perseverance, even when it appears you are “losing the battle.” You will face times like you want to quit when faced with hardships and trials, but a warrior walks by faith and not by sight and believes God will come through. When a warrior falls in battle without surrendering or giving up, his spirit grows stronger.
4.      You must diligently train yourself to be a warrior through prayer, worship, reading the Word, praying in the spirit, and being still to hear God’s voice. If you don’t train yourself spiritually, you cannot expect to win the battle.
5.      You must face your “giants” (whatever has intimidated you or caused you to live in defeat). Facing your giant’s means by faith you speak the Word of God into those situations and you don’t move your position until there is complete breakthrough. You may also need to confront in love those who have intimidated you or caused you to live fearfully.
6.      You must become resilient, meaning able to bounce back quickly from the “flaming arrows” the wicked one tosses at you. A warrior will catch the arrow before it can penetrate the heart and throw it back to the sender. You must not look, dwell, or engage in the arrows that are thrown to you-disengage immediately and fight in the spirit.
7.      Warriors must live and breathe hope. Hope is a confident reassurance that God does hear your prayers and that you can trust His Word. Without hope, defeat is imminent.
8.      Warriors must have an attitude that is set on NEVER, EVER GIVING UP! When “battle fatigue” sets in or when the forces of darkness becomes hot on your tails, and you want to “throw in the towel,”-don’t! Set your mind that you will go out fighting for your complete victory, for your children and your family. Warriors fight until the end!
9.      Warriors must be brave, courageous, and fearless in the face of opposition. Warriors know that they are children of the Most High God and God does fight for them. Warriors know that God has their back! When you know that God has you covered no demon in hell can defeat you.
10.  Warriors trust their commander and leader (Jesus Christ). Warriors obey the direction of the One in charge.

It’s time to arise and become warriors for the Kingdom of God taking back all your inheritance as a child of God, and moving forward through the battleground courageously slaying your giants.

MEDIATE ON THESE SCRIPTURES:

Be strong, and let us fight bravely for our people and the cities of our God. The Lord will do what is good in his sight.
2 Samuel 10:12

For everyone born of God overcomes the world. This victory that has overcome the world, even our faith.
1 John 5:4

For you have girded me with strength for battle; you have subdued under me those who rose up against me.
Psalm 18:39

Through you we will push back our adversaries; through Your name we will trample down those who rise up against us.

Psalm 44:5

Monday, March 13, 2017

Counselor’s Corner Focus on What You Are Doing Right


Focus can be defined as what you concentrate on the most or the center of your attention. Are the thoughts about yourself centered on what you are doing right more or on what you are doing wrong more?


We all have faults, weaknesses, and have made mistakes. The problem is when the enemy places a magnifying glass over each one of your weaknesses, and your focus becomes distorted and all you can see are the negative aspects about yourself. Focusing on your deficits can cause discouragement, defeat, and depression. Focusing too long on what is wrong with you can cause you to shrink back and not go forward, and this is exactly where the enemy wants you-stuck in the past and living in defeat of your past mistakes. If God has forgiven your sins, He does not keep reminding you of your failures.

Reflect and ponder: What do you think of yourself most of the time? Is your focus on your good qualities and character more or on the negative? Have you allowed other people’s opinions about you to define what you think about yourself? What do you believe God focuses on about you? What do you love about yourself?

Counselor’s Corner: The enemy will attempt to get you to focus on all that is wrong with yourself. There are some key things to watch for and to recognize when the enemy has your focus distorted on the negative areas in your life.

1.      Your focus will turn to your circumstances more than to Jesus, and your circumstances will appear larger than they really are. When your focus shifts to all the distractions, chaos, and upheaval around you it is easy to feel anxious, uneasy, irritable, worried, and fearful.
2.      Confusion instead of clarity. You can doubt yourself, your strengths and your abilities because the enemy has you focused on what you have done wrong.
3.      Past hurts and insecurities are magnified. What you thought you dealt with in the past gets rehashed. This rehashing is an attempt to weaken you and to cause you to doubt what God is doing in your life. The past is used to hinder you as you attempt to move forward and enter a new season in your life. The enemy will try and derail progress and growth.

This week CHOOSE to focus on your strengths, your victories, and your good qualities. Write out what God shows you about yourself and CHOOSE to believe Him. CHOOSE to completely forgive yourself of any past mistakes and CHOOSE to love and nurture yourself. Be good to yourself. Don’t let the enemy erect lies in your mind about yourself, he is the accuser of the brethren.

MEDIATE ON THESE SCRIPTURES:

Set your mind on things above, not on things on Earth.
Colossians 3:2

Fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith.
Hebrews 12:2








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