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What to Do When You Are Disappointed

A relationship does not work out, a job does not go through, or your prodigal child that you have been praying for does not seem to leave their rebellious life. We all have experienced times of disappointment, and it is a normal part of life. What is important to know is that if disappointment is not dealt with, it can eventually lead to depression. This is a scheme from the enemy. Something you really wanted does not work out, you dwell on why it did not work out, and eventually you begin to feel depressed.

Your thoughts will always follow your behavior.
7 Things to do when you feel disappointed:
1.Consider that what may have not worked out could be God’s doing. Perhaps, He was protecting you from something you did not even know about. 2.Go before God and ask Him to help you deal with your disappointment, and to show you the truth. Ask God to show you His perspective on the situation. 3.Take every thought captive. Do not let your mind wander and think whatever it wants. When something dis…
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COUNSELOR'S CORNER: Dealing with Loss and Pain During Christmas

I do not know how you cope during the holidays if you have had any losses or pain in your life, but I would recommend doing what you candoand don’t try to keep up with other’s. You will need extra rest and time alone with God to process your grief.

 Do not feel pressure to attend Christmas parties or programs. I recently had a Christmas program at my church, and I really wanted to go; but I was having a bad day and I did not feel that I could handle going. Why, you may ask? I knew I was already feeling a bit emotional and hearing certain Christmas songs would most likely make me sad and being around others who have family might also make me feel sad. I do what I can, and I no longer feel guilty when I cannot be and do what EVERYBODY else is doing. I have finally come to the realization that I am not able to do everything (even if other people will not understand).
The holidays can be a mix of emotions for people, it can bring out some of our fondest memories as well as our deepest pai…

Counselor's Corner: Having Realistic Expectations for Christmas

Christmas is about celebrating the birth of Jesus, but somehow we have tangled in there other expectations. If we kept the true meaning of Christmas at the center of our minds, we would not have any unrealistic expectations. But, we all do it, create in our minds the “perfect little Christmas.” Perhaps, we watch too many sappy Lifetime or Hallmark channel movies and begin fantasizing about having that awesome family or that spouse we have dreamed of. Every year at Christmas, I fall into the same trap of wanting everything to finally be right with my family, my child, and the list goes on and on. I want my home to be decorated with the most amazing lights and have homemade baked goods for all my neighbors. I want my family to be together and to get along. I want a normal family, you know the ones that are portrayed in those Norman Rockwell paintings. I want to be able to entertain and hosts all of my family without getting tired or frustrated with them. You get the picture, right?
But, …

Counselor's Corner: Living in the Present, Take it One Day at a Time

How many of us, if we are honest, live stressed-out and anxious/worried about tomorrow? If you answered yes to that question, you are not alone. When we live our lives projecting tomorrow’s outcomes we forfeit the grace God supplies to us daily, not in lump sums. How many of us try and store God’s grace for us? We believe with enough planning and control we can predict outcomes as well as secure our future. But we could not be more wrong. How many of us have tried to get a close handle on our lives by predicting the outcomes of our lives. We try and analyze and figure-out every possible outcome and situation until we become exhausted and frustrated. Life happens and we cannot live on tomorrow’s provisions for today.
Living in the past or projecting the future will cause stress, anxiety, worry, fear, fatigue and possible illness.

Some of us try and live in the past because we have not “settled” our past or properly let-go and healed our hurts as well as past failures. Some of us try an…

Counselor's Corner: When Trusting God Does Not Come Easily

Through this article I am hoping to shed some light on a topic that is not discussed frequently in Christian circles. When I accepted Jesus as my Savior over 18 years ago, I had major issues with trust. I had been abused, rejected and betrayed by the very people who said that they loved me and were supposed to protect me. I was indoctrinated almost immediately that I could trust God and that He loved me, however, no one know my hidden secret that I did not trust God. I wanted so desperately to trust Jesus, but I viewed Him the way I viewed the people who had hurt me. I was a Christian and I did believe that I would go to heaven if I died, but when I received salvation I did it out of fear that I would not spend eternity in hell. I believed all the lies that penetrated my soul for many years that people were bad and that they could not be trusted; thus this affected my relationship with God.
I struggled for most of my Christian walk being able to trust that God would protect me from ev…

Counselor's Corner: How to Rejoice in Your Difficult Circumstances

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Not always an easy scripture to swallow, especially if you have gone through long trials and debilitating circumstances. The Apostle Paul in this scripture was not teaching that we should thank God for everything that happens to us, but in everything. Evil does not come from God, so we should not thank Him for it, but when evil strikes, we can still be thankful for God’s presence and for the good that He will accomplish through the distress (Romans 8:28).
It is easy to give thanks when a baby is born, when someone gets married, or when your child graduates college and lands a good job, but what about when you have a prodigal child, long for a spouse, or have a family member on drugs? Not as easy to give thanks then. If we are human, than we can admit that it is more of a challenge to be thankful for our difficult circumstances. We can grow weary i…

Counselor's Corner: Managing Stress in Healthy Ways

Between 75-90% of all doctor’s visitsare stress-related. Stress comes in a variety of symptoms, ailments, and conditions. Stress can affect you spiritually, physically, and emotionally. There are many things in life to cause us to feel stress and anxious. Chronic stress can complicate matters and can lead to burn-out and Adrenal Fatigue.
The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines stress as a state of mental tension and worry caused by problems in your life, work, etc.; something that causes strong feelings of worry and anxiety; a physical, chemical factor that causes bodily or mental tension and may be a factor in disease causation.
►What happens to our bodies under stress? 1.Cortisol mediates various metabolic processes. Cortisol levels can be elevated if we are under physical or psychological stress. 2.Immune system can weaken and you can become more susceptible to colds and flus. 3.Have difficulty falling or staying asleep. 4.Bouts of irritability, anger, and easily frustrated/annoyed. 5.F…

Counselor's Corner: Causes of Offense

A definition of offense is an annoyance or resentment brought about by a perceived insult or disregard for one’s standards or principals. Synonyms for offense: annoyance, anger, resentment, indignation, irritation, wrath and displeasure.
Those who are easily offended are usually described as “wounded, hurt, insulted, angry, or disappointed.”  When someone gets offended, they take everything personally. Scripture teaches however, if we keep our focus upon God and His Word, He will maintain peace in our hearts that can withstand offense, “Great peace have those who love your law, and nothing can make them stumble.” Psalm 119:165; “You will keep him in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.” Isaiah 26:3

►Causes of Offense:
Unhealed past wounds/hurts: There are Christians who are “touchy” or extremely sensitive. They spend much of their time hurt or upset at people and at circumstances. For these types of Christians, we should be patient and gentle with them…