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With God's help, I Provide hope and encouragement to women of faith through practical advice and tools. I blog about my personal experiences in overcoming trials, and I use my background in counseling to give tips and techniques to live a victorious life.
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Christians That Get Entangled
We are called to be Holy and to live righteously
before God. We are also called to be a light in this dark world, but what
happens when you become entangled in helping others? Merriam-Webster defines
entanglement as something that entangles, confuses, or ensnares. The condition
of being deeply involved. Synonyms for entanglement are web, mesh, net, noose,
quicksand, snare, toil, and trap. Free Dictionary defines entanglement as
twisting together or entwine into a confusing mass. To complicate or confuse.
Being entangled makes you feel like you are in a web.
Have you ever tried to help someone repeatedly and
felt you were getting entangled in their problems? The more you try and help
the more you feel like you are getting into quicksand and you feel there is no
answer to their situations, which in turn causes you frustration. You start
second guessing if you are a “real Christian.” You feel a sense of guilt over
not being able to cope and handle all the problems that others bring to you.
Many times the very people you are entangled with are piling heaps of guilt and
manipulation upon you. This is especially difficult when dealing with loved
ones and family. There is a deeper entanglement that comes from the ones we
love. We don’t want them to suffer and to hurt, but what happens when all the
helping is not helping but hurting you?
The enemy will bring situations and people into you
path to distract and derail your purposes. There are some signs to watch for
when you have gone too deep with someone.
you feel prompted by the Holy Spirit to intervene or was it pressure from the
other person or a desire to please?
you struggling with your walk with God? Feeling spiritually bankrupt? Youth
time with God is lacking and you are having trouble focusing on hearing God’s
may feel discouraged, defeated, and like a failure.
are not sure God called you be in ministry and you lose your desire to minister.
feel stress, turmoil, tension, strife, chaos, and confusion.
can’t seem to get a clear or direct answer from the person you are trying to
help. It seems when you talk with person you are trying to help it is muddy.
may experience fatigue and even sickness.
person you are trying to help does not listen to the advice you are trying to
give to them, and they continue to do what they are doing; meanwhile still
wanting you to fix their problems.
begin to feel frustrated, irritable, and maybe even angry.
are consumed with trying to intervene, and maybe even losing sleep as a result.
Your focus is on their situation, and not on Christ.
peace is gone and joy has dissipated.
amount of intervention or help is never enough for the person or people you are
feel emotionally, physically and spiritually drained.
feel distracted and out of balance.
15. You feel like you are on an emotional roller
coaster ride with their issues.
try and point them to Jesus but discern they are not sincere in seeking Him.
You may be dealing with a toxic person. If you do
not do what they want you to do, and they resort to anger, name calling,
belittling, or guilt; that is a trait of a toxic person. To get entangled in a toxic
person’s issues is dangerous to your mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual
well-being. Not all people who say they want help, in fact really want help.
Some people are used by the agents of hell to entangle you and ensnare you. A
HALLMARK OF A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP IS BOTH RECEIVE AND BOTH GIVE. There is also
harmony, peace, and a desire to be around the other person. If you begin to
dread being around that person or talking to them, it is a sign that it is not
a healthy relationship.
Restoration and reconciliation are always hoped for
in these types of relationships, but until Christ is at the center some
precautions need to be made for your sanity.
a time-out from these destructive relationships. Regain your peace and order.
Ask the Lord Jesus to step-in and take full control, and you step out before
you go under with them.
in love. The person that repeatedly causes drama and chaos in your life should
be confronted as the Holy Spirit directs. Don’t do this in anger, but with the
hope of true repentance.
proper boundaries and consequences. This is important in dealing with ones who
say they are sorry but continue to repeat the same behaviors over and over again.
You will need to keep a guard up, and observe their behavior for a time (a
solid year of consistent behavior is a good indication of true change), before realigning
your life to theirs.
in mind that Jesus is not expecting to wear yourself out to help others who are
not really helping themselves.
taking care of you and foster the good and positive relationships in your life.
Stay away from toxic and negative people as much as possible. Nurture yourself
and love yourself.
times when we are engaged with other toxic people we neglect our other relationships
that are satisfying. Take time to rebuild and restore satisfying relationships.
yourself and let go of all guilt. Guilt is a tool straight from the pit of
hell. It NEVER comes from God.
fast in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and not to be entangled
again with the yoke of bondage. Galatians 5:1, KJV
don’t get tied up in the affairs of civilian life, for then they cannot please
the officer who enlisted them. 2 Timothy 2:4, NLT
If you have been married for any length of time you
know that marriage is hard work. As with anything successful in your life
putting time and effort are keys to how fruitful those things will be.
you did not have the proper role models growing up to show you how to have a
successful marriage, but you desire to have a healthy marriage.
God has brought you together with your spouse the greatest investment that you
can make besides your relationship with God is your marriage.
Anyone can have a dull, lifeless marriage, but a marriage
that is thriving takes certain elements to help it succeed. If you planted some
flowers but forgot to fertilize and water those plants they would eventually
become lifeless and die. Healthy marriages take the time to nurture and weed
out anything hindering their relationship.
Couples striving for a healthy marriage should first
ask God to cleanse their hearts of any unforgiveness, anger, resentment or
offenses of their spouse. Staying angry or rese…
you focus on the most will grow. The enemy will try to get
you to focus on what is wrong, what is not working, and what is worrisome to
you. When you lose your focus on what is
true, what is right, what is lovely and what is a good report (Philippians
4:6), you will begin to focus on the opposite of these.
to focus on the good will be a daily decision. When the enemy shows
you something that is causing fear, worry or frustration, turn away and CHOOSE to focus on the good.
→If your focus has been more on the negative lately
check to see who you have been hanging out with, what you have been reading or
watching on TV, and giving your attention to the most.
→An unthankful heart can cause you to focus on your
wants, but a heart of gratitude will cause you to focus on your blessings.
Distractions come to sidetrack you and get you to
focus on what the enemy has brought in front of you. Keeping focus on Jesus means deliberately
fading out everything that pulls you away from the…