Counselor's Corner: Fear of the Unknown Can Keep You Stuck

Transitioning into a new season in life takes courage and faith. Fear of the unknown can cause you to remain stuck in the present season that you are in, and not move forward in faith to what you believe God has called you to do.

I believe God wants me to move forward in my life, but there are some people in my life that I have had a hard time letting go of because I don’t know what will happen if I let them go whether temporarily or permanently. These people in my life have been a weight or burden and caused tremendous amounts of stress to me over the years, but I kept holding on hoping they would change. Keeping unhealthy and toxic people close to you will cause more damage to you than you may realize, and will keep you stuck from being free to move onto the things God has for you. I have these “fears” that if I let go of these significant relationships in my life I don’t know if they will reject me, abandon me or I don’t know if I will have to face loneliness. I clung onto these relationships because of the void I might have in my life. For years I held on tightly to these relationships because I feared the unknown. I guess you could say I did not trust God enough to let Him work in their lives without me trying to fix and solve their problems.

You may not be in a situation where you may need to let go of a relationship for a season, but you may be battling other future fears like, “What happens if my prodigal child never “comes home,” or What if I can’t pay my bills.” The list of fears of the future are endless. Fear of the unknown is rooted in worry and anxiety, and ultimately not trusting God fully with the unknowns in your life.

Fear of death, fear of loss and agoraphobia (someone who fears the outdoors) go hand in hand with the fear of the unknown. Also, past death experiences, near death of a loved one, divorce, or change of lifestyle can also be related to the fear of the unknown.

Fear of the unknown can create mental blocks that can have a detrimental impact on living your life to the fullest. Living your life to the fullest potential can only be achieved when you come face to face with your fear of the unknown. There are many layers and emotions associated with the fear of the unknown, you will have to do some deep work with the Holy Spirit.

Reflect on this when you are tempted to fear something in your future: 85% of what you worry about will never happen, and 15% of what does happen you can handle better than you thought you could.

Taking your thoughts captive is a key to helping with overcoming fear of the future. If you tend to think worst-case scenarios for the future, you bet you will have some concerns for the future. Discipline yourself to speak out loud God’s truth from His Word and other faith-filled statements over yourself daily that will change the course of your thinking over time. Remember the truth that most of what you worry about never happens. Imagining what could happen down the road will cause you to worry and be anxious.

Spend some time with the God and uncover the roots of your fears of the future, journal what God may reveal to you. Pray over each issue and commit those concerns as often as needed to God.

Some tragic things may have happened to you and it very likely changed the course of your thinking and behavior, now instead of seeing the future as bright, teeming with potential, you may now see the future as scary and are cautious in your everyday decisions. Don’t ignore your fears, face them, bring them to the open and allow God to heal and speak truth into those situations. Take it one day at a time, trying not to project all future events as catastrophic, and if you do, stop, take the thought captive and replace that thought with truth.

Try and focus on what is going right in your life, and daily write down your blessings, this will help shift any negative thoughts about the future to the positives in your life now. Overtime you can retrain your brain to focus on the blessings in your life, instead of all of what could go wrong.

Fear of the unknown can be detrimental to you being able to move forward in life, and enjoying your life. If you have endured some tragedy or trauma, your fear of the unknown is normal but with some hard work you can overcome the fear of the unknown in your life.