I have a hard
time saying no and often feel selfish for doing so. It is so hard to let people
down and know that they are disappointed with you.
As I slipped away to be alone with the Lord, His
response to me was refreshing and yet surprising to me. God showed me I have
limits, and that I would be wise to know what they are. We are not called to do
everything that is placed in front of us. Really? I thought we were. My warped motto
has been for years if there is a need, meet it. After living this motto for
most of my life, I am now realizing that it is not emotionally, mentally, or
spiritually healthy.
Everyone
has their limits on what they can endure. There are some warning
signs that you have gone past your limitations.
Here
are a few of those signs:
1. Increased
frustration, irritability, and anger.
2. Lack
of patience.
3. Sleep
is disturbed- feel restless and nightmares.
4. Your
“cup” feels empty or dry, but you keep giving anyway.
5. Fatigue,
headaches, backaches and an overall sense of malaise.
6. Not
at peace, feel anxious and worried instead of casting your care on the Lord.
7. Feel
pressured, cornered, or guilty at the demands of others.
8. Burdened,
heavy, and overwhelmed.
People
without boundaries will be the first to violate your time.
We need to know when God is in something and when He is not. One of the biggest
keys to knowing if God is in something is having His peace. If you are feeling
anxious or confused about doing something, that is a great indicator that God
may not want you involved. Saying No is not easy if you are accustomed to
pleasing others. It may seem selfish not to intervene or you may not feel like
a “good Christian.”
If we do everything that comes across our paths, it
will be a surefire way to exhaustion and burn-out. I recently had to set limits
on helping a family member. I had already put out so much time and energy with
this family member, I just had to set a limit. Was this hard? Yes, but I am
learning to minister in the rhythm that Jesus did. Jesus took breaks from the
demands of His ministry for peace and rest. Luke 5:16 tells us, “Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and
prayed.” Sometimes, we need to pull
away from the “crowds” and be with the Lord. We should do this as often as we
need to. This does not make you weak or a failure, but it will make you hear
from the Father in what He should have you to do. Being connected to the Father
above everything else will bring you peace, strength and joy.
Breathe.
Relax. Slow-down
You
cannot be everything to everyone!
What
ways do you have difficulty setting limits? What happens when you do not set
limits in your life?
Thanks so much for this.
ReplyDeleteI was recently taken advantage of and have had a week of very poor sleep.
Yesterday morning God spoke to me to show me when and where the problem had begun, and after some fervent prayer into this, I believe the " problem" is fixed.
Some people are very hard to say " no" to.
My heart went out to a newcomer to my country who has 4 children and no car, so I offered to take her to the supermarket and take the shopping home.
What actually happend bordered on abuse and far exceeded my limits.
We continue to be life-long learners!!
Oh, how I can relate! I have had to learn that not everything coming my way is for me to pick up and intervene. Your right, some folks are harder to say "No" to. I am learning to listen for the Holy Spirit's leading if I should do this or that.
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