Friday, March 3, 2017

Counselor’s Corner: Keep Standing for Truth



We may live in a culture that is saturated with things completely opposite of God, but now is not the time to back down in intimidation. The media is encouraging and glorifying immorality, violence, and subtly incorporating new age teachings into TV shows and movies. The millennials of today are some of the most confused morally that we have ever had in generations past. The definition of love for many is about whatever makes me feel good and total acceptance of whatever that form of love is.
In the 1940’s, some of the most serious problems among young people was talking out of turn, making noise, and littering. In the 1980’s, the problems of the younger generation escalated to drug abuse, alcohol abuse, pregnancy, suicide, rape, and assault. The 1960’s was a pivotal time that paved the way for the decline in morality and pursuing whatever makes you feel good. During this time, the Bible and prayer was removed from public schools, no-fault divorce lawyers paved the way for an increase in divorce and cohabitation, and the Supreme Court decision of Roe vs. Wade to legalize abortion.

What will happen if as Christians we do not take a stand now? Gay marriage is legal, but what will be next if we don’t stand for truth? Children as young as five are now able to decide on their own if they want to change genders, and many parents are supporting their children’s decisions.  Anyone can have access to public restrooms and dressing rooms. Facebook reportedly has 58 different types of sexual orientations you can choose for your profile.  Now there is bigender, pangender, transqueer, and the list goes on and on. What will be next? I have never been more confused as when I was reading about the different types of sexual orientations that there are now. What happened to just LBGT, or for that matter, male and female? Did God not create us in His image, male and female?
Problems arise when we leave God out of the equation, everything is permissible and acceptable. Not that long cohabitating and even having children out of marriage was taboo, but now it has been accepted widely by our godless culture. When I had my son out of marriage over 20 years ago, I knew it was wrong and I did not desire in the least bit to live with my boyfriend. I wanted to be married and raise my son with a father and a mother, but so much has changed since then. Women no longer are disgraced about having children out of marriage and living with their significant other. Sexual immortality is not just about homosexuality or gender identity confusion, but all forms including habitual fornication (cohabitation), adultery, and pornography.

Is morality important? Author and scholar, C.S. Lewis thought so.
 “Morality ensures fair play and harmony between individuals, helps make us good people in order to have a good society, and it keeps us in good relationship with the power that created us.”

A report from Psychology Today concluded, “The most significant predictor of a person’s moral behavior may be religious commitment.”

Reflect and ponder: If we don’t take a stand for something, we will stand for nothing. What are you standing for? God and His truth, or pleasing man by agreeing and compromising with unbiblical truths?

Counselor’s Corner:

How to stand for truth in our culture of ungodliness:

1.      Let your light shine before men, meaning we should act and live in ways that support the Gospel.
2.      Do not compromise with sin or entertain sin. Do not waver in what you believe. Others are watching and observing what you do.
3.      When you share truth, do so with a spirit of humility, gentleness and love.
4.      If you are opposed, attacked, or mocked; pray for your enemies. Do not retaliate in anger or vengeance.
5.      Respect everyone, even those who oppose the things of God. All people are deserving of value, worth and dignity. You cannot force someone to do something, but you don’t have to align in agreement with them. God does give us all free choice. We are not to force our beliefs unto others.
6.      Do not twist scripture to align with an ungodly lifestyle or sin.
7.      Live a quiet and peaceful life. You don’t have to protest what you believe. Never use hate speech or act in a hateful or prideful manner. You can show others at times Christ just by being joyful, full of God’s peace, loving, and when they do ask, “Why are you so different,” Tell them!

MEDITATE ON THESE SCRIPTURES:

Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers.
Psalm 1:1

If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.
Matthew 16:14






Thursday, March 2, 2017

Counselor’s Corner: It’s Time to Move Forward and Get Unstuck from Your Past


Nothing can hinder us more than staying stuck in the past. You cannot move forward into the new season that God has for you until you make peace with your past. Making peace with your past includes forgiving yourself, forgiving the ones who have hurt you, letting go of false guilt, letting go of how things should be or could have been, and releasing every toxic memory of the past.
Moving forward means fresh start. All the old ways of thinking and doing things that did not work before are left behind. Your past had a purpose, you most likely now are stronger in your faith and commitment to Christ.


Continually bringing up the past, especially repeating memories that are harmful serves no purpose but to decrease your hope and your faith and to increase discouragement and depression. There is a time to go back into your past to heal your broken and wounded hearts, but when that stage of healing is over, you need to move forward so that you do not get stuck in past pain.

The enemy wants you stuck like quicksand in your hurtful past and painful memories? Why? Because you cannot live the life that Christ came to give you fully. Christ wants you living free and also joyfully. Yes, you are to enjoy your life to the fullest. How can you enjoy your life when you are bound to the past, reliving your past to anyone who will hear your sad stories as a way to gain pity. Christ does not want you pitiful but powerful. Stop focusing on the problems of the past, what did not work, who was not there, who you lost, or even why something happened.

Let God heal your brokenness and then begin to live again.

Reflect and ponder: Do you feel stuck in your past problems and old wounds and can’t seem to move forward in your life?

Counselor’s Corner: God does not want you to rehash, remember and replay your old wounds and past problems, He wants to heal your heart, set you free, and release you to move forward. Make peace with your past, it happened, and no matter how you wanted things to have turned out differently-they didn’t! Focusing on the past is a surefire way to keep you in bondage. Traumatic memories are very powerful, and they can keep you stuck in pain. Painful memories can throw your physiology out of balance and prevent you from experiencing the peace of the present moment. People who live in the past of painful memories cannot enjoy the present very well because they keep reliving what has hurt them. When you think about the negative aspects of your past, fear, dread, worry, discouragement and even depression can hold you captive. Bad memories have strong negative emotions attached to them, which triggers physical and chemical changes in your body. Every time a bad memory causes a stressful response it takes up to 36 hours for your body to rid the stress hormones. If your mind is constantly replaying bad memories, your body does not get a chance to return to its natural resting state and as a result your body stays geared-up.

Steps to moving forward:

1.      Take the necessary time to grieve. If you have had trauma in your life, you will need to get to the “roots” of your embedded pain. Allow Jesus to begin to heal the “roots” that get uncovered. Acknowledge what has hurt you, and don’t use anything to numb your pain. When you have not processed your pain or trauma memories, your mind is concerned and will try and relive the memories with the hope of some type of resolution.
2.      Rewire your brain. If you have endured a crisis, a trauma or extended stressors; your brain needs to be rewired. Trauma has a negative impact on the brain, but you can daily start to repeat scriptures and positive truths that reflect the truth in God’s Word over your life. Rewiring your brain is simply replacing the memories of the trauma or wound with God’s Word.
3.      Make new goals, including short-term and long-term goals. Write out your goals.
4.      Ask the Holy Spirit to help you to forgive and to release everyone who has hurt you. Forgiveness is key to being able to move forward. Forgiveness does not mean reconciliation. Forgiveness is done on your part, but reconciliation involves both parties with repentance at the core.
5.      Refocus on things that are positive and of a good report and the traumatic memories will eventually be filed away as over. This is where taking every thought captive into the obedience of Christ can be applied (2 Corinthians 10:5). As a painful memory tries to steal your current peace, refocus immediately on something that is positive. Do not dwell on the painful memory and especially don’t go back and try and figure out why something happened. What you are doing by refocusing your thoughts is essentially erasing the harmful memories to make way for positive memories and the ability to get unstuck.
6.      To stay moving forward, release and process painful events immediately. When you don’t release painful emotions regularly, they can get stuck and will eventually cause illness. Release pain as soon as possible in prayer, alone with God, or with a trusted, Godly person.

MEDITATE ON THESE SCRIPTURES:

He restores my soul.
Psalm 23:3

He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness the prisoners.
Isiah 61:1

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.
Psalm 147:3



Wednesday, March 1, 2017

Counselor’s Corner: Secure Your Borders When Your Defenses Are Down


Wounded soldiers that are engaged in battle know that when they are hit repeatedly by the enemy’s arsenal of weapons they cannot fight as strong. Other stronger soldiers take wounded soldiers off the front line of battle and apply any first aid and allow the solider to heal before going back out into the war zone. Christians, we are in a war zone! There are times that we are hit repeatedly by the enemy’s arrows with the hope that continual assaults will cause us to go down. When your defenses have been weakened through the spiritual battles you face; it is time to secure your borders.

Reflect and ponder: Do you feel like arrows have been thrown at you so many times by the enemy, you are not sure you can stand from the blows? 

Counselor’s Corner:

How do you know if your borders need to be secured?

1.      Repeated attacks or threat of attacks. You do not feel as safe and secure when you don’t know where the next attack will come from.
2.      Fear of when the next strike will come. Feeling on guard and on high alert.
3.      Battle fatigue. The constant assaults have caused weariness.
The enemy knows that the wounded are the easiest to keep down. If you have been repeatedly struck by the ammunition of your adversary, your defenses may be down. Inspect where your borders have been breached and reinforce your artillery.

How to secure your borders and strengthen your defenses?

1.      Get alone with the Father as much as possible. Take off your schedule what is not necessary to be able to hear the Holy Spirit. During this time ask the Father for a Divine strategy.
2.      Walk and pray the perimeters of your home and property. Ask the Lord to bless your home and property and to remove anything that is unclean or unholy in the name of Jesus. If you have any anointing oil, anoint your property and every room in your home and as you do so say, “Cover this room/property in the blood of Jesus Christ.”
3.      Praise and worship God as much as possible. Praise even when you don’t feel like it.
4.      Read scriptures over yourself, your home and your circumstances. The Word of God is a defense against the enemy’s lies.
5.      Be careful who you are hanging out. The people who you hang around can have a huge influence in your life, and if your defenses are down the enemy can use people to further weaken your borders. Being around people who encourage a godless lifestyle will not help to strengthen your borders. Surround yourself with strong Christians who can encourage and pray for you.

MEDIATE ON THESE SCRIPTURES:

And I will set your border from the Red Sea to the Sea of the Philistines, and from the wilderness to the Euphrates, for I will give the inhabitants of the land into your hand, and you shall drive them out before you.
Exodus 23:31

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.
Matthew 11:28

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you or forsake you.
Deuteronomy 31:6
           




Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Counselor’s Corner: When Opposition Comes Your Way


Have you ever noticed when you are trying to move forward in the things that God wants you to do, opposition comes? In the book of Nehemiah, opposition came to Nehemiah when he began rebuilding the walls in Jerusalem. Nehemiah was confident of his task that he had prayed about, but he received opposition immediately, during, and right before completing the wall. In every generation, there are those who resist God’s people and try to block God’s purpose. When you set out to do God’s work, some will oppose you and some will hope that you fail. The work of rebuilding the wall progressed despite the opposition and discouragement, because the Nehemiah and his workers did not lose faith or give up, but they preserved because they knew God had given them an assignment to do.

Sanballat and Tobiah were two of the main opposing forces to Nehemiah. When Nehemiah almost had the wall completed, Sanballat and Tobiah realized their efforts were not working so they decided to attack Nehemiah’s character. They attacked Nehemiah personally with rumors and false reports. Personal attacks can hurt us deeply, especially when the criticism is unjustified. When you are living for God or doing His work, you may receive attacks on your character. Nehemiah overlooked and ignored the abuse, and he kept rebuilding the wall. Despite the resistance, the wall around Jerusalem was built in record time! Nehemiah kept pressing forward despite opposition, attacks on his character and false reports.

When opposition builds against you or the work you are doing for God, it can be tempting to pray, “Get me out of this Lord!” But Nehemiah prayed, “Strengthen my hands.” When Nehemiah prayed for strength, God always answered him.

Jesus even faced opposition. The Pharisees opposed Jesus!

Reflect and ponder: Have you felt opposition as you were trying to live for God or work for Him? Maybe the opposition is coming from the culture around you that is in opposition to the ways of God, or perhaps from religious groups. When you face opposition, do you quit, run and hide, or push through? What do you think God wants you to do?

Counselor’s Corner:

In the book of Nehemiah, there were at least six types of oppositions that was encountered; you may encounter these as well as you are living for Christ. Be aware of the opposition that may come your way, so you can stand your ground and move forward.

1.      The anger of others against you.
 Most if not all of the anger will be unjustified. You most likely will feel sucker-punched by the angry blows directed towards you. When you get serious about living for God, the enemy will use people to stir anger towards you.
2.      Mockery as you take a stand for Christ.
Others will wait for you to fail, so they can say, “See, I told you Christians were no different.” Your commitment to Christ threatens godless lifestyles.
3.      Intimidation.
The enemy gets more aggressive when you don’t back down, and will use intimidation against you. The enemy uses subtle and overt intimidation against Christians. If you make a stand for truth and God’s Word, intimidation comes to back you down and cause you to stop.
4.      Discouragement and fatigue.
People usually get tired in the middle, not the beginning. The beginning of our relationship with Christ is exciting and fresh, and when we begin a new project for the Lord it can be exhilarating; but discouragement and fatigue can come strong as we are in the middle and we need a push to finish strong. Many right now just need a push to finish strong. When this happens, renew your commitment to the Lord, refresh with the Word of God, ask the Lord to strengthen you to finish strong, and gather strong supporters around you.
5.      Negative reports.
These reports can come as our enemy to our faith. Negative reports seek to derail our faith and bring us down. Remember when the spies gave their narrative of the Promised Land in Numbers 13:28-29, their report was, “We are like grasshoppers in their sight. There is no way we can take the land.”
6.      Fear.
Fear is the biggest opposition we will face, this tactic is used when all the other opposing forces have not worked against you. The enemy will use fear to paralyze you, and abort the task He has called you to do.

When opposition comes, you can run and hide, compromise, or take a stand and move forward. When you face opposition don’t get angry, take vengeance, or allow it to steal your time and focus. There is a time to confront those who oppose God’s ways, but it should never become a distraction to your purpose. In our culture, Christians are compromising and neglecting what God says in order to “keep peace and not offend,” sinful actions and lifestyles. As Christians we must take a stand for truth.

MEDITATE ON THESE SCRIPTURES:

Do not be afraid of them. Remember the Lord God, great and awesome.
Nehemiah 4:14

When the enemy comes in like a flood, the Spirit of the Lord God will lift up a standard against him.
Isaiah 59:19




Monday, February 27, 2017

Counselor’s Corner: The Lord is My Shepherd


King David wrote Psalm 23 by using his earlier experiences caring for sheep. King David understood what the role of a Shepherd to his sheep was, and used that analogy to compare what Jesus, the Good Shepherded does for His people.

What are sheep like?

Sheep are prone to predator attacks and cannot defend themselves, mainly because they have no defenses such as claws. Sheep are helpless creatures who cannot survive very long without a shepherd. Sheep are not very smart and get confused very easy. Sheep are known to wonder off away from the care and protection of their shepherd. Sheep are difficult to train. Sheep are easily frightened. The bottom line is that sheep will not survive very long without a shepherd guiding and protecting them.

What do Shepherd’s do?

Shepherds not only guide sheep along the right path but they defend them fiercely against dangerous predators. Shepherds also take care of sheep by feeding them and protecting them from threatening insects. A shepherd provides all that a sheep would need, all the sheep needs to do is follow the shepherd. A sheep only gets lost and in trouble when they wonder off. A shepherd will go after just one of his sheep that has wandered off.

Reflect and Ponder: Do you recognize that we are like sheep in need of a Shepherd? Do you allow the Good Shepherd to lead you or do you go on wondering your own way? What happens when you wonder off without The Shepherd leading you?

Counselor’s Corner:

In a sheepfold, a shepherd functions as a door, letting the sheep in and protecting them. Jesus is the door for salvation. Some people do not like that Jesus is the door, the only way to access God; but He came to seek and save the lost and bring them back into the fold. Jesus said He laid down His life for His sheep, and He did by dying for the sins of the world. God is concerned about every human being that He created (He is not willing that not even one should perish, (2 Peter 3:9).

When we do come into the fold and the Good Shepherd’s care, He guides us not just in this life but into eternity. The Good Shepherd takes care of His flock under His watch, we are under His protection against the enemies that come against us. When we stray off, the Good Shepherd prods us gently back into the fold.

If you are going through a difficult time, write out all of Psalm 23 and place on your nightstand, read out loud every night before you go to bed. Psalm 23 is the most common scripture recited around the world, mainly because of the great comfort that it brings during distressing times, and a reminder that the Lord is our shepherd.

MEDITATE ON THESE SCRIPTURES:

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me to lie down in green pastures; He leads me besides still waters. He restores my soul; He leads me in the path of righteousness for His name sake.
Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for you are with me; your rod and staff comfort me. You prepare a table before my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup runs over, surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life. And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.
Psalm 23

As for you, my sheep, the sheep of my pasture, you are men, and I am your God, declares the Lord God.
Ezekiel 34:31

All of us like sheep have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way; but the Lord has caused the inequity of us all to fall on Him.
Isaiah 53:6

What do you think? If a man has a hundred sheep, and one of them has gone astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountains and go and search for the one that is straying.
Matthew 18:12-13

I am the Good Shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me.
John 10:14


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